by The Happy WAHM
Fridays are fun! Especially when I get to sit down and write.
Just got back in from a special day trip to the city, and I am intentionally not logging in to my business e-mail yet coz I need (no, I want) to stay focused on this post.
I’ve just been tagged in a blogging meme, and it so thrilled me that I’m trying not to mind the fact that I really have no idea what a blogging meme is. Until two days ago, that is. So here I am, writing this post grinning from ear-to-ear. Excited to do slam-booking again. Oh, yeah! I did that back in high school, too! I think I had one for all four years of high school. Before each school year ends, all us girls would be passing around our respective slam books. And everyone would be watching out for each other’s answer for that all-important question: “Who is your crush?” Well, I didn’t have one. Or maybe one of my classmates who could be stumbling on this post can help me recall whose name I’ve written?
This blogging meme, Old School Blogging: Alphabet Edition, is being hosted by Elaine and her friend, Jennifer. While this trying-hard-to-blog WAHM has been tagged by that awesome blogger, Patty.
So, without further ado, here’s the ABC of me.
A. Attached or Single? Attached.
B. Best Friend? The hubby, my buddy.
C. Cake or pie? Both! And throw in some tarts, please!
D. Day of choice? Today! Ha ha!
E. Essential Item? My smartphone.
F. Favorite color? Red. For ruby, my birthstone. And blue, my birth color. And yellow, coz it’s a happy color, and I’m a happy person. And green, the color of life. And… okay, I’ll just write rainbow.
G. Gummy bears or worms? Errrr… Pass?
H. Home town? San Jose, Occidental Mindoro. I’m a mangyan!
I. Favorite Indulgence? Uh, I don’t indulge. I’m praticality personified. Well, gadgets, maybe? I really want another smartphone!
J. January or July? July. It’s my birth month. And anniversary month, too!
K. Kids? Three. Two girls and a boy.
L. Life isn’t complete without? Music. And my smartphone, coz I store my music in it.
M. Marriage date? July 28, 1999. Wait. No. Hubby says it’s November 15, 1998. 🙂
N. Number of brothers/sisters? 1 brother and 1 sister.
O. Oranges or Apples? I want them both. Why do I always have to make a choice on food?
P. Phobias? The sea. I drowned when I was really little (at that age that when somebody tells me “don’t go near the water”, I hear “go ahead and frolic”, and I was in a boating accident back in college.
Q. Quotes? Happiness is a choice. And don’t ask me who said that first. I just know I’ve been saying that since 1995.
R. Reasons to smile? My kids. Music. Tarts. Robert Fulghum.
S. Season of choice? We only have the wet and dry season, but can I just say a little sun and a little rain?
T. Tag 5 People: Jenn, Raquel, Cheska, Lourdes, and Ginger.
U. Unknown fact about me? I’m a very insecure person. It doesn’t show, but I’m also very sensitive and I cry a lot.
V. Vegetable? Carrot, squash. And papaya is a vegetable, but I prefer to wait ’til it’s orange.
W. Worst habit? Not sleeping enough.
X. Xray or Ultrasound? Ultrasound. No radiation to worry about.
Y. Your favorite food? Mango shrimp crabs squid chocolate. Geez, can I just make a full list?
Z. Zodiac sign? Cancer
So there! I had fun! Join the fun by clicking on the photo below, grab the code and put it at the end of your post, just like I did. Thank you for reading, and looking forward to the next tag. 🙂
by The Happy WAHM
This is just one of the things that I am learning to do more consistently now.
Listening attentively. To words spoken. To those left unspoken. And to nuances of everyday life.
A good but rather sad news prompted me to write tonight. Because this is one of those times that I need to listen to what life is telling me.
Our piano teacher is leaving to work in a music school in Singapore. It is good and I am truly happy for him that he has been given this opportunity. I have given him a glowing testimonial when he asked me for one, and it was not an empty one. He really is very good.
We are sad to be losing him, though. Jude has just started his piano lessons this summer, and already he has shown the dedication and commitment to the craft. He never needed prompting from me to practice. And Bea has been looking forward to the more difficult pieces that the teacher has told her to be the ones she will begin to study after the recital this coming Sunday. So this news that our teacher will be leaving before the month ends gave me a bit of a letdown. We need to find a new teacher immediately, as I don’t want to disrupt the younger kids’ momentum.
So what has this got to do with attentive listening?
Since last year, Bea has been bugging me about her desire to play the violin. And Xia has her heart on playing the guitar. The piano is for me. It has always been for me. For the dream that I do not believe I’ll ever realize. And I’m trying to reach my dream through my children.
I’d like to defend myself and say, well, the piano lessons started as part of their MAPE class. And I know I have all the best of intentions. I want them to learn how to read notes. Another skill I never developed because I cheated in music by simply using my ears. Oido. Oh, I can read notes. If it’s in middle C, or if there’s a gun pointed at me, and my level of motivation will be about the same.
Another point I tell the children, there are no violin nor guitar teachers within a 15-kilometer radius. Well, if we make it a 20-kilometer radius, teachers actually abound. Smart kids that they are, I’m sure that fact occurred to them. After all, we do drive 20 kilometers to get to soccer training. But obedient kids that they are, they have simply kept quiet.
Last Christmas, I knew that Xia really wanted to have an electric guitar, but she already has the acoustic, so I asked her to defer on buying the electric one. And Bea has been going around music stores canvassing for violin prices. Last week, she was so excited to have found one that only costs Php3,500. But, baby, there are no teachers.
Before they started their summer piano lessons last April, we made a pact. They can each begin their lessons in their respective desired instruments after the recital, but they will still continue to have piano lessons. Bea agreed, Xia was non-committal, and Jude said he’ll just continue to play the piano. Happy mom, I am!
And today, this news that we are losing our piano teacher.
Well, we can always look for a new teacher. At the very same place where I can find a violin and a guitar teacher. Ironic, right?
A line from the musical “Joseph, The Dreamer” resonates: “God, are you trying to tell me something?”
It’s like there is some Higher Force telling me: “Give up already! Your kids want something else. You’re a mom! Your job is to nurture whatever talent your kids have been gifted with, not shove your dream down their throats! Rejoice in what they aspire to achieve. Be supported of their own dreams.” The Force is onto me. He knows my excuses, and is now giving me reason not to have to make them anymore.
So yeah, I’ll have that trip to the city next week to look for a violin teacher, a guitar teacher and of course, a piano teacher for Jude. They have lived my dream for two years, about time I support theirs for the rest of my life.
Photo from joycemoore.blogspot.com
Now, here’s the kicker.
Bea: Pero Mommy, itutuloy ko pa rin ang piano, pwede?
By all means, baby. By all means.
by The Happy WAHM
Been staring at the monitor a good 15 minutes now, and I can’t think of anything to write. A writer’s block. Again. As always!
It’s Friday, and Thursday has been insane! The project I’ve been working on, the fulfillment centralization for my client, finally came to fruition yesterday. We’ve done the integration and life should be easier, schedule should be lighter. But life happens. Everything that could go wrong has been going wrong since yesterday. And all I can do is be responsive to the call of putting some semblance of order to the chaos of work. Payments not going through, orders coming out as incomplete, items not where they should be, customers clicking the incorrect option… the list goes on. And that’s only on that one project. While all the other tasks continue to demand my immediate attention.
A few months ago, I’d be on the verge of crying by this time. Especially since my work backlog has been piling up. But I’ve learned a very important trick that has made me enjoy my crazy life. I’ve learned how to keep calm and be happy.
Today is supposed to be the day that I take my final exams for the course that I’m taking at Coursera. It’s a four-week course, and I’m still on my third week materials. I’m still calm. No need to panic. I have until May 25 1 AM EDT to take it. So I’m still good!
Today is also the day that I’m supposed to write my assignment essay from the Write On, Mom workshop. Well, Martine has given us ’til Sunday to submit, so I’m praying for inspiration to strike before then. Know what, I write better when I’m pressed for time. When I don’t have to overthink. That’s when I write from the heart. Well, I always write from the heart. Except when I have to write blurbs for my clients, on topics that I have no serious interest in. 🙂
I’m supposed to be cramming with my reading, finishing the lectures and taking the quizzes, so I will be prepared for the final exams, but I logged in to this blog instead, thinking of working on my essay. But I’m not ready. So I’m writing this post instead.
I am calm. I’m not worried. I have learned, in the past couple of months, that stepping back from what can be stressful is good. I used to wake up thinking of what could be waiting for me online. Have problems come up while I was sleeping? Am I going to have a busy day? Am I going to wait up at the piano lessons, or just drop off the kids, come home and work?
These days, I am calm.
And these days, I am happier.
I enjoy my driver duty days. I enjoy my soccer mommy days. I leave the office behind when I have to. And I have more focus on being the mom that my kids need. Still a working mom. Still very much driven as a career person and an entrepreneur, but somehow, I have learned not to stress over things that I have no influence over.
So I’ve written a whole post without getting to the reason that I am logged in here in the first place. I still have not gotten to the groove of writing my essay. But I am happy. I have let my mind wander and let my fingers translate my thoughts into readable words that I can share with the world.
I am calm.
by The Happy WAHM
Oh, my goodness! After that, I’m speechless.
Today is the worst, so far. Coz it rained yesterday and the field is muddy. But those shoes are what I deal with everyday.
It’s been 54 days since my kids started soccer training, and boy, am I so proud of them! Six days a week, Monday to Saturday, they’d wake up at the crack of dawn and prepare to go to training. Milk, cookies, shower, get into their jerseys, get the shin guards and line up for Mommy to put on their socks and shoes.
Well, at least for the two younger ones. My 13-year old can actually put on her shin guards and knee socks, which can sometimes be a challenge. 🙂
I’ve never been athletic. I tried to be, back in high school. But dance was, and will always be, my passion, so it took precedence. Although come to think of it, dance is a sport, right? So I can claim to be athletic. Except that I danced cultural, not the power dances that are considered as sports.
I did gymnastics for a short time. Then softball as a shortstop, a bit of volleyball, did sprints on the track and field, and badminton. But I’d really rather be practicing my sway balance and waltz than do strenuous sports training. So yeah, I’m no athlete.
That’s why it’s been quite a challenge to keep up with the kids’ schedule this summer. Daily training for soccer, from 6:00 AM to 8:30 AM. Since the field is still a good 30-minute drive, we have to leave the house at 5:30 AM, which means we actually wake up at 4:00 AM so we can have time for a light breakfast and shower. While they train, I study my lessons on my tab. Yeah, I’m a Courseran, too! 🙂 Glutton for punishment, right?
Then we make a dash for home, take a quick meal and a bath, and off again to the Drum and Lyre Band training ’til 11:00 AM. We take a quick lunch and give the kids another shower and prepare again for their piano lessons at 1:00 PM. Sometimes, I’d just grab my laptop and my pocket wi-fi so I can put in some work while I wait up for the kids ’til 4:00 PM, instead of leaving and coming back to pick them up.
It’s a good thing that the piano lessons and the band training are only on Mondays, Wednesdays and Fridays. Otherwise, I’d be dead by now. 🙂 And have I mentioned that I handwash their jerseys and socks everyday?
They’ve been to two tournaments, and looking forward to at least one more before summer ends. By then I’d be an expert sports mom. The first tournament we went to, we were so unprepared! I thought it was a single game kind of thing. What do you know! Tournaments, even for kiddies, are whole day affairs. So the next one we went to, we were more armed with the necessities. Like a cooler full of water and ice, several shirts to change to after each game, towels, an umbrella and a visor cap. Next time, I’d remember to wear rubber shoes and bring long sleeved polo to protect my arms. The heat and dust in these events are not for the fainthearted.
So while I am really supportive of whatever my kids choose to do, there are days that I feel like I’m way over my head. Like today, when I have to deal with muddy shoes. And socks! Thank God for my eldest who helped with the clean up, and the fact that it’s Tuesday, so no band practice to run to.
The kids? It’s another story. They voluntarily sleep early, they look forward to each training day and seeing their new-found friends. They seem to not get tired at all. They’re having the time of their lives! And that in itself is a reward.
by The Happy WAHM
Sometime in May 2011, I came across a status update from my niece. And I commented: “I miss Meredith Grey and Cristina Yang!” Well, her status sounded like it came from a TV soap opera.
Anyways, what followed was a search on the net for the famous quotes that I so loved each time I’d watch Grey’s Anatomy re-runs. I was thinking: “Hmmm… I’d pluck a quote from Meredith and make it my status on Facebook.”
Three pages on to a site that features all those much loved quotes from the first season to the latest, and I still have not found one quote that I could apply to my present situation.
And then it finally dawned on me…
When you’re happy and in love and contented with your life, you have no place for whatever Meredith, or Cristina, or Izzie, George or Derek, have to say. Not even Miranda Bailey.
See, I used to cry buckets at each ending of a Grey’s Anatomy episode. From the season when they were interns, to the time that they were surgeons, their struggles have so affected me. I would sit in front of the TV and for an entire hour, I would be left alone. It would be Mommy’s hour, so the kids leave me alone. It was a weekly routine, like an unspoken contract between me and the rest of the family. Once in every week, I have the TV to myself. Nobody wants to watch it with me. 🙂
But when Denny died, I was almost, but not quite, banned from watching any of the succeeding episodes. See, they found me shaking with sobs a full fifteen minutes after the credits have rolled, and the CSI team were very much into a crime investigation.
Fast forward to today…
No more dates with Derek, or Alex, or Sloan. Not interested anymore. Addison went to LA, George got divorced, Meredith’s an orphan, and she had miscarried, Cristina’s still as stubborn as a mule.
Are they ever going to be happy?
I’m way too busy to sit and wait for their happy ending.
And besides, Denny died, Alice died, and George, I wonder if he died in that season finale. I didn’t want to find out. It would be way too depressing. I loved George. So I didn’t wait with bated breath for the next season.
I’ve outgrown the drama in Seattle Grace Hospital. Or I simply no longer have the energy to empathize. It’s way too draining to be in the same room with them.
Although there may be moments that I will always remember. Like this exchange between Derek and Meredith:
Derek: Hey. You almost died today.
Meredith: Yeah, I almost died today. I can’t, I can’t remember our last kiss. All I could think about was “I’m going to die today” and I can’t remember our last kiss. Which, is pathetic but the last time we were together and happy, I want to be able remember that, and I can’t Derek. I can’t remember.
Derek: I’m glad you didn’t die today. It was a Thursday morning, you were wearing that ratty little ‘Dartmouth’ T-shirt you look so good in, the one with the hole at the back of the neck. You’d just washed you hair and you smelled like some kind of…flower. I was running late for surgery, you said you were going to see me later, and you lean to me, put your hand on my chest and you kissed me. Soft. It was quick. Kinda like a habit. You know, like we’d do it everyday for the rest of our lives. And you went back reading the newspaper and I went to work. That was the last time we kissed.
Isn’t that sweet?
And this one, from Preston to Cristina:
I am Preston Burke, a widely renowned cardiothorasic surgeon. I am a professional. And more than that I am a good and kind person. I am a person that cleans up behind myself. I am a person that cooks well. And you, you are an unbelievable slob. A slovenly, angry intern. I am Preston Burke. And you, you are the most competitive, most guarded, most stubborn, most challenging person I have ever met. And I love you. What the hell is the matter with you that you wont just let me?
Don’t you just wish you have some guy who would love you no matter what?
But of course, we already know that Preston left Cristina at the altar. That coward! So that’s another strike against them for me. I mean, it was a cruel way to end a relationship.
And so, no more Grey’s Anatomy. I’m busy. I’m happy. I’m in love. I am loved. I am blessed. I won’t let somebody’s story dampen my days.
But hey, I’m not saying I won’t borrow some quotes from them from time to time.
Like this one. For the friend I lost and found again, just the other day, here in Facebook.
We’re friends, real friends. And that means, no matter how long it takes, when you finally do decide to look back, I’ll still be here.
She has not accepted my friend request yet, but I’m hoping that she will. We’re friends. I’ll wait.
